Pedal, pedal. The bicyclopter's blades spun through the air. Pedal, pedal, pedal. Pinkie hummed to herself, working on her next musical number: she was thinking this one would be about smiling. Songs don't just HAPPEN, after all! She would know. During her years of training in the discipline of crime-fighting, Pinkie Pie had mastered many things. The art of the one-pony band was perhaps her most difficult feat.
Then she burst out laughing. Crime-fighting? In Equestria? How silly! A big smile sat on her snout as Rainbow Dash's cloud mansion came into view.
Tonight was going to be the best sleepover extravaganza EVER! Twilight had enjoyed her first one with Applejack and Rarity lots and lots. When Pinkie heard about this non-Pinkie party, she saw one thing: a challenger! So a few weeks of planning, cajoling, and sweets under the table later, the six-pony sleepover had been prepared! Fluttershy was being picked up by Big Macintosh, and Applejack was making sure Rarity remembered their night of fun. So that left Pinkie Pie with the task of making sure that lazy pony Rainbow Dash didn't forget to come!
Parking her hoof-powered whirligig in a cloudbank, she hopped along over to Dash's door. "Ding dong!" she warbled. "Dingity dong!" Ten seconds passed by. Pinkie tilted her head. Was she here? Better go check. So, she walked through the door, since it was just made of clouds. Carefully she neglected to wonder why the floor clouds were solid. That kind of over-thinking led to comedic injuries. And her neck was a bit too sore for stretching out long enough to make her fall amusing to the audience! Another giggle burst out. It was fun to pretend to be a cartoon character, but really, Twilight just cast the cloudwalking spell on her hoofsies before she set off.
As she stepped inside, she readjusted her saddlebags. They were stuffed full of tickly feathers designed to wake up ANY sleepyhead. Pinkie Pie looked around her with interest. Liquid rainbow gleamed through the walls of accumulated cumulus, trickling and rushing through them. Very pretty, she thought. Not tasty, sadly, but quite pretty. She touched the cloud surface with a hoof, feeling it yield gently. So soft... Pinkie wondered if Dash had a sleeping bag made of this stuff. Was it even softer? A gleam of curiosity now twinkled in her eye. This question demanded ANSWERS!
So, of course, she found her way to the bedroom, giggling at the odd scroll-like bed her friend used. As she turned her head every which way to find a cloud-closet, she spotted something not white or rainbow in color. It was a small glossy corner peeping out from under a cloud.
Pinkie trotted over and brushed away the wisp. There was a whole pile of magazines there! Rarity had some of those in the waiting room to her boutique, full of bored-looking ponies standing around, too busy being fancy and dressy and exotic to smile. Those were reeeally dull. But Rarity didn't have any of these titles though. How do you even PRONOUNCE that? Zzzziz? Eckzzzz? Eggzuhzuh? "X, X, X," she spelled aloud. She shrugged. Maybe it was a typo.
That mare on the cover certainly looked interesting, though. Pinkie Pie opened it and looked at the pictures. There were a LOT of those. And very few of the fillies were just standing around. "...oooh, I know who would like to see these! Twilight LOVES books! Magazines are books, yeah? And she SURE doesn't have any of these!"
Smiling, she dumped out her feathers and loaded up the goods. She put the wisp back and turned to leave.
Then she playfully punched her cheek with a hoof. She was being SUCH a silly pony: Rainbow owned these! So Pinkie left a note before she went to show her friends. It works at libraries, right?
Twilight's muzzle was buried deep in a thick tome. It detailed a few intriguing myths about the creation of Equestria. "Twilight!" There were several differing accounts, for Celestia kept rather mum on that score and Discord's reign had distorted most records that could be made out. She wondered if she should ask her teacher about this subject, then decided against it. "Twiiiiiliiiiight!" It was far more enjoyable to learn the truth for herself. It meant more to make her own discoveries. "TWILIGHT! You gotta see this!" A double-page spread of frisky young fillies spreading their hind legs for the camera was dropped on top of the pages she was intently studying.
"Gyaaahh!" Twilight Sparkle sprang backwards onto all fours. "Wh-what the Sorrel Hells are you DOING?"
Pinkie Pie was grinning at her friend, surrounded by the porn she had spread over the floor. "Do you like them?"
Spike walked into the room, saying, "Pinkie Pie wanted in to talk about some books she found." He spotted a Playcolt at his feet and reached to pick it up. "Hey, is this a comic boo---"
"NO!" She ripped it away from his hand telekinetically. "Don't touch it! Don't look at it! AVERT YOUR GAZE!!"
"COVER YOUR EYES AND LEAVE!!"
Sighing, he covered his eyes, turned around and dutifully bumped into a doorpost, then stumbled out the door.
Pinkie frowned. "So...you DON'T like these?"
Twilight spluttered incoherently for a full minute. Finally, she spat out, "Pinkie, you do NOT just shove your pornography into a pony's face, ESPECIALLY around a minor!"
"Pony-grappy? Is THAT what you call it?" Pinkie Pie flipped through one with her hoof. "They're certainly good at grapping."
The purple pony stalked over to her, fire burning in her eyes. "Are you even listening to---" She saw what she was looking at. "Is that a...?"
"Are her hooves...?"
"Behind there, yeah."
"They fit that whole---"
"Thingamajig, yeah. See this picture?" She tapped it. "It takes two of them, but it fits."
Twilight's cheeks colored, then she laid down next to her friend. Pinkie reached down to turn the page with her mouth. "No... I'm not done with that one yet."